Happy 61st Birthday, Sofia — Although Science Has Its Doubts
Today, somewhere in the peaceful village of Marzio, in the province of Varese, my cousin Sofia officially turns 61.
I say “officially” because, after careful observation, the number appears scientifically incompatible with the available evidence.
Sofia simply does not look her age. This leaves us with several possible explanations: an exceptionally favourable genetic mutation, a secret anti-ageing laboratory hidden beneath the “Conca di Smeraldo”, or—currently the most credible hypothesis—a mysterious pact with supernatural entities.
We do not know exactly what she promised them in exchange for eternal youth. Perhaps a few souls, perhaps the recipe for a perfect risotto, or perhaps merely a lifetime supply of birthday cake. Whatever the agreement was, it clearly worked. The authorities have been informed, and a joint investigation involving dermatologists, astrophysicists and exorcists may begin shortly.
Joking aside, Sofia has always been much more than a cousin to me. She is practically a sister.
We grew up together, sharing those years when days seemed endless, summers lasted forever and becoming adults appeared to be a remote and frankly unnecessary possibility. Life has since taken us along different paths, and today we cannot spend as much time together as we did when we were kids.
But distance, commitments and the complicated trajectories of adult life cannot erase a bond built over so many years. Some people remain part of who we are, even when we do not see them as often as we would like. Sofia is unquestionably one of those people for me.
So, happy 61st birthday, dear Sofia!
I hope you continue to face life with your smile, your spirit and your suspiciously supernatural resistance to ageing. And if the mysterious entities behind all this are reading Risolnet, please note that we would also be interested in discussing a family subscription.
With all my love, from your cousin—although “brother” would probably be more accurate.
Happy birthday, Sofia. Sixty-one years declared, considerably fewer detected.